


Still Life with a Red Poppy

by imaginedandreal



Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, Complicated Relationships, Crime Scenes, Drama, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Getting Back Together, Secrets, Skeletons In The Closet, Small Towns, Stalking, Suspense
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-31
Updated: 2019-10-03
Packaged: 2020-07-28 06:22:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 18,228
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20059456
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imaginedandreal/pseuds/imaginedandreal
Summary: The follow up to Always Say Always. Tessa and Scott try to repair a fragile connection after reuniting in their hometown of Ilderton. They hide their romantic feelings for each other - which have resurfaced after so many years - from Scott’s wife Dina and his daughter, Tessie, his childhood friend’s namesake. And from each other, too. They tell themselves they are content with just being friends.Yet, as the two of them continue to make sense of their complicated relationship, something - someone - much darker and more disturbing comes to threaten everyone in the small town, including the people closest to Scott...





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [tessafreakingvirtue](https://archiveofourown.org/users/tessafreakingvirtue/gifts).

> I really have no detailed outline but the general idea of each chapter, so I hope it won't be too exasperating for you readers😊That said, I want to try my hand at something different and, due to the demand from the comments to ASA, I wanted to do a sequel of sorts. Be advised, while not hardcore, it will deal with some dramatic stuff (I debated whether to tag it as 'thriller' also, but that just sounded so dumb lmao). I don't know how else to call it, so I went with drama.
> 
> This is for you, tessafreakingvirtue - the author of the wonderful Little Things. That fic inspired this one, as I now also realize. It's a humble gift, but it's from the heart💝

Tessa entered the door, holding Scotty’s small hand in hers, and immediately, nostalgia walloped her. Vanilla Cloud, the most popular ice cream cafe in Ilderton, was just the same as during her own childhood and teenagehood. The steel-backed, retro chairs and tables and the brightly colored whimsical paintings of various ice cream treats on the walls took her right back to the past. The hum of the ice cream machine, the conversations of the people and the clink of spoons against the small bowls were all just the same. Like no time had passed. Like nothing had happened beyond Tessa, then aged seven, pulling a nine year-old Scott’s hand to go occupy free seats, eager to satisfy her sweet tooth. 

Meanwhile, little Tessie was already pulling Scott’s hand, just like her own Scotty was doing to her. 

“Let’s go, Daddy, let’s go! Gotta find a seat!” The little girl trotted over right to the nearest free table for four.

“Let’s go, Mama, let’s go!” Scotty parrotted, tugging on Tessa’s sleeve, before he took off following Tessie. Tessa exchanged an amused look with Scott. Mischief glinted in his expression, making his thirty-something self look like a young boy, too. 

“They really hit it off, didn’t they?” he wondered softly, gazing on their offspring as they settled on the chairs. Tessa nodded in the kids’ direction.

“They sure did. It’s kind of surreal, isn’t it?” he mused, following her to the table the two children had chosen. Tessa gave him a glance. A shiver crept up her spine. Of course, Scott would point that out. She knew, after what she privately called the Airport Meeting, years ago, that her difficult feelings for him were mutual. But also, that they were friends, first of all, and something incomprehensible did prevent them from transitioning into romance.

And now, here they were in their hometown again, with kids from different spouses. So much for starting over.

“You think so, too?” she spoke then, while they sat down and half-listened to Tessie and Scotty’s chattering. His eyes were so steady and warm. They did not sparkle slyly anymore.

“I do, kiddo, believe it or not. Almost makes me wonder - ” Scott stopped suddenly, looking almost ashamed of himself in a flash. His ears reddened, like he’d nearly was about to give away an impossible secret. But Tessa knew, even without him finishing, what the situation made him wonder about. She’d wondered the same herself, so often - now double as much, in the face of the new changes to them as individuals.

“I’ll - I’ll go order then?” she grasped at the straw, seeing that Tessie and Scotty had now gotten impatiently eager to approach the ice cream display for selections. She didn’t want to keep sitting there at that moment, with the unspoken hovering in the air between them.

Scott snapped out of the slight awkward tension and stood hurriedly. “No, no, Tess, I wouldn’t dream. It’s my treat, remember? I was the one to invite you. Why don’t I go and have the kiddoes choose their own? What about you - double chocolate for you, as always?” 

_ Back to thoughtful and sweet Scott. _ Tessa had to stifle a rush of uncalled-for affection and warmth. _ You might be divorced, but this is very much a married man. Losers weepers, Virtue. _

“Sure, thank you,” she said feebly, watching him and the children approach the counter. She did not understand why his remembrance of her favorite ice cream order threatened to reduce her to tears. Was it because she was sure he still cared for her? Tessa blinked rapidly, focusing on Scott’s attentive and careful consultation of her Scotty and his own daughter on the ice cream varieties. He showed as much care to the little boy as he did to Tessie, and that stabbed a bittersweet pang into her heart. Neither did Tessa miss the cafe salesgirl’s observation to the effect of ‘your children are so cute.’ _ His _children? Oh, if only the poor girl knew. But Scott was so caring and gentle, as he listened to her son. He made no distinction at all between the children, and Tessa, with a sharp pang inside her soul, understood why the girl behind the counter thought Scotty was his. The four of them looked, impossibly, ridiculously, like a family. 

Closing her eyes, she told herself to _ stop it. _ Whatever happened, happened. If they are only meant for friendship, and are never allowed any chances at anything else, well...that’s just the way it will have to go. Tessa was reminded of that woman, Scott’s _ wife, _ whose name she did not even know yet. What would she think if she knew Tessa was pining after her husband? Why, indeed, was she not even on this day out with him and Tessie? Tessa wondered, too, if Scott would have acknowledged her, showed that he recognized at all in his wife’s presence. No, she shook herself quickly, a man with a heart as big as Scott’s would never insult her this way, wife or not.

Again, childish laughter pulled her out of the admittedly uneasy musing. Tessie and Scotty returned to settle, impatiently and excitedly, at the table, as Scott approached more slowly, with a grin and arms full of a tray laden with four different glasses of ice cream. As the children shrieked with joy, his eyes found Tessa’s, and he gave a fond nod in the direction of his daughter and Tessa’s son. It was, also, such a bizarrely _ parental _ look, as if saying: _ look at our awesome kids. _On one hand, of course, he was visibly proud of having a daughter like Tessie, and knew that she, Tessa, was proud of being Scotty’s mom. They enjoyed seeing their babies happy, separately from each other. But to her, somehow, that was a look that husbands also give wives, when they sit back admiring their offspring. Were Scott’s eyes so soft and loving when he looked into the mother of his daughter’s eyes?

“Hey, Tess,” his gentle voice broke through her mind once more. “You okay? Don’t like it?” He pointed his own spoon at her glass.

“No, it’s great,” Tessa hurried to assure him, dipping a half-reluctant spoon into the ball of chocolate ice cream in her glass. “It’s just...this is nice. Having a moment to sit down somewhere outside the house.”

Scott nodded, that enigmatic smile lingering on his face. Tessa glanced towards the children, aware of the odd mood between them and wanting to look at something less nerve-wracking than _ his _eyes.

“Mine’s delicious!” Tessie exclaimed, momentarily directing their attention to where she and Scotty were comparing their ice cream for who’s tasted better.

“Well, mine’s delicious-er!” Scotty challenged, slurping up another spoonful of his.

“Prove it!”

Tessie narrowed her hazel eyes - resembling Scott like two drops of water when she did it, Tessa noticed. Her heart did not hesitate to give a pang at this for the umpteenth time. 

Scott’s daughter dipped her spoon into Scotty’s glass, without further ado. She retrieved it and made a hum, comically like an adult, when she tasted it. 

“Yeah, I like yours better,” she said, mischief dancing in her eyes - Scott’s truly hazel eyes. Tessa’s heart warmed at the sight of this little girl acting like her father had at a few years older than she was, with playful exuberance. 

“Hey!” Scotty protested, when she stuck her spoon into his ice cream again, but Tessa saw that he was grinning. Then, he reciprocated. “Now, you gotta share with me!” 

The children giggled as they began to alternately eat from each other’s glasses. 

“Tessie, it’s nice to ask permission first before trying someone else’s food,” Scott reminded her, gently tugging on her bouncy little pigtail. 

Tessie looked a bit shy, even as she licked off another spoonful of Scotty’s dessert. “I’m sorry, Scott. Can I have more of your ice cream?”

The adults stifled a laugh, as Scotty responded with an eager, “Yeah! You can. Because mine is still delicious-er,” the little boy said, to which Tessa ruffled his hair, chuckling. 

She turned back to Scott, doing her best to quell the palpitations of her heart as she watched his face radiating affection for his daughter and her own son. She did not know anyone more perfect than him to be a father to a child. 

_ Another woman has this. His warmth and gentleness and adoration towards her and their daughter. Not you, Tessa Virtue. Because you couldn’t suck it up and be just a little braver in the past. _

“What’cha thinkin about, T?” Scott’s voice was soft, as he pulled her out of her heavy thought. Tessa blinked, shrugging and mustering up a nonchalant expression. “So…where’s Mrs. Moir?” Her voice sounded artificially high and cheery. Scott raised a dark eyebrow.

“You mean my wife?” The adoration vanished from his eyes. If anything, he looked strangely guilty, like this innocent foray into the cafe together was already a transgression against his marriage. 

Tessa nibbled on her lip, eyes darting to the happily talking kids. “Yeah. She didn’t want to come out with you guys?” 

As soon as she asked it, she wished she could take it back. It was none of her business what Scott’s wife was doing.

Scott’s brow furrowed a bit, as he answered. “Oh, no. Dina usually does go with us, of course. She’s just out with some friends. Every two months, she does ladies day out with her girls. This time, we decided to each do our own thing. She works so much, I want to give her that. Free time apart in a marriage is important too, isn’t it?” he added, with a high laugh of his own. 

Tessa was either hearing things, or he sounded defensive that his wife, _ Dina, _chose not to accompany them. Now she could attach a name to her mental image of the woman whom Scott married. Dina must have been clever, funny, and not least of all, very attractive, in order to have caught Scott’s eye enough to share his life with her. For a tormenting couple of seconds, Tessa imagined a statuesque beauty, infinitely worthier than she is. All because Scott had chosen her and not Tessa. She scolded herself for succumbing to juvenile jealousy, as soon as she thought about it. 

With a small sigh, she ate another decorous spoonful of ice cream, simply to busy herself. Scott did not seem to notice her gloomy self-deprecating thoughts - if he did, he didn’t show it. And then Tessa grew angry at herself. He had been her best friend, and she wasn’t being very appreciative of seeing him again. Regardless of their unrealized romantic desires, they have been friends, and Tessa was glad to see him again, in any capacity. Maybe the Airport Meeting all the years ago was really a moment of weakness and nothing else. 

They ended up going to the toy store, both because Scott had revealed that he promised it to Tessie, and because Scotty looked at her with such pleading eyes, she would feel terrible if she denied her son this other indulgence.

“Besides,” Scott piped up, throwing her a sly wink, “why not celebrate our reunion?” 

_ Reunion as what? Friends? Future illicit lovers?! _Tessa already despised the idea of inveigling Scott to cheat on Dina. Even if she quite literally was aching with yearning for him (as she confessed to herself shamefully), she would never dare do that to another woman. That’s what her ex-husband and his mistress had done to her, and she didn’t want to cause pain and anger to a woman she ultimately had nothing against. 

“Sounds great,” she agreed, in spite of herself. She squeezed Scotty’s small hand, and led him after Scott and Tessie, both children already bouncing with anticipation. 

In the toy store, the parents let the children run free (to a certain extent), following them a few steps away. Scott had described his Tessie as spirited but well-mannered and careful, and, while Tessa sometimes had to deal with Scotty’s own antics, she knew he was, for the most part, a well-behaved boy too. The little girl and boy raced up and down the aisles, more than happy to check out the various dolls, superhero figures, sports toys, and pretend kitchen sets. From time to time, either one brought a few toys to consult with their parents, but nothing yet had caught their fancy enough to do the pretty-please-with-puppy-eyes-on-top routine. 

Scott smiled quietly at their rambunctious son and daughter, then faced Tessa sideways.

“So, how have you been all this time, T?”

Tessa shrugged, unsure of what to say. Her career was well enough, very good even. But that all seldom mattered when she, a divorced mother, sometimes fell prey to desperate spells of forlorn loneliness.

“Not bad,” she admitted, which was not entirely false. Of course, her job made her happy and fulfilled her, on top of paying the bills, and Scotty was a blessing of a son whom she’d never trade for anyone. Her marriage had tanked, Scotty being the only good outcome from the handful of years spent lying to herself about the positive aspects to both her husband and wedded life overall. How to articulate all that to Scott, who was so clearly well and steadily married? 

“I decided that the head-spinning spotlight was a bit too much for me. I mean, that year in Paris was great, but it was too hectic to really make it worth its while completely. I wanted some peace and quiet, as weird as it sounds,” she said, with a little laugh. Scott smiled, nodding at that.

“Believe it or not, that was why I also didn’t stay in Toronto,” he agreed. “Something was making me want to come back here, for good. Maybe it’s because we’re from here.” 

Neither of them clarified: _ Maybe we both hoped that we’d run into each other again. _

Now they did. And it confused them even more, this mixture of bittersweet memories and a cautious happiness of simply being near the other person. 

Scott, for a moment, looked like he was about to say something else, but a jingle of his phone with an incoming text made him put his hand into his pocket. He took out the phone, glancing at a new message. His lips quirked up. Tessa tried her hardest not to dart a glance towards the screen. She would not violate his privacy, though the texter may well have been -

“Hey, T, wanna meet my wife?”

Before Tessa knew it, he was tilting the phone screen in her direction, and she had no choice but to look at what he was showing her, if only out of politeness and respect for his spouse. He was showing her a photo of several women, all beaming and well-dressed, sporting shopping bags and standing in front of a movie theater.

“They’re just about ready to go see the latest tearjerker,” Scott explained, but Tessa hardly heard him.

“And which one - which one is Dina? That’s her name right? Sorry,” she blurted out, flustered to no end. She had no idea why she pretended not to remember his wife’s name from the first time she heard it. Scott smiled and pointed at a woman right in the center, the most petite in stature.

“Yeah, there she is. That’s my Dina.” 

Tessa stared hard at the grinning woman. Scott’s voice was, at most, affectionate and warm, and not at all enamored, like a loving husband’s voice usually would be. While she had no doubt that he really did love this woman, she was almost certain that he did not marry her for passionate love. But how was he not _ in love _with her? Even Tessa herself, an admittedly straight woman (with a painful penchant for the least timely men), could appreciate Dina’s simple, whimsical beauty, if strictly aesthetically. With her small yet proportionate figure and waves of waist-length red hair, Dina looked like some maiden from a pre-Raphaelite painting, who had accidentally stumbled into a twenty-first century city mall. 

Tessa swallowed slightly and gave Scott a deliberately blithe smile. “She seems really nice. I’m happy for you, Scott.” Miraculously, her voice did not sound robotic and insincere.

At that, Scott did earnestly grin. “She is. She’s a great person,” he affirmed, pocketing his phone. “She’s kind of like you, actually.”

_ Thud, _went her heart. Tessa blinked, feeling a betraying blush steal over her face. “How?” she almost whispered. She made a point of peering between several aisles, like she was looking for Scotty.

“She’s got that deceptive sweet and nice appearance, but underneath it, she’s strong as hell. You know how I ended up popping the question? I’d gotten a super nasty bug of stomach flu the other time, while we were first dating. It couldn’t have been more than five months into it. Di was all in, I’m telling you. She babied me to no end and ended up doing some pretty hardcore stuff to care for me, as you can guess. I’ve had it really bad, and seriously, Tess, I’ve never yet met a less squeamish person than her.” 

He scrunched up his face evocatively, and Tessa could not help erupting with giggles. She noted with vicarious pleasure that he related the story like Dina was no more than his other close friend, who cared for him in a time of illness. So, he literally took the phrase _ in sickness and in health _ seriously enough. She contrasted that with her own ex, who suddenly always acquired ‘emergency stuff’ whenever she took sick with anything. Except, the emergencies had most likely always involved the other woman, who contributed to their marriage falling apart.

“That was lovely of her. That’s what every caring boyfriend or girlfriend would do,” Tessa said, and here, her voice did sound artificial. Scott smiled again, all the same.

“It _ was _. And after that, well a good while after that, if we’re talking formally, I just figured out...why not?”

_ Why not, _while not the absolute best reason to marry anyone, was a reason nevertheless, Tessa thought, being careful to let out a soft sigh, so Scott wouldn’t catch it. 

_ Thud. _ His hand has nudged hers, and her palm opened to slip into his, like a flower having no choice but to unfurl under the sun. His touch sent her careening back into everything - their first-ever meeting on the rink, their first Halloween, the years worth of beaches, dances, schoolwork, summer fairs, sudden rainstorms in the park after picnics, the ever-present realization of just how _ dear _this boy and man was to her. To their first and last kiss, before it all disappeared, to reappear in the least expected way.

He was holding her hand with the arm that had sported her friendship bracelet. Now, that same arm had a smooth band of gold on the fourth finger of its hand. 

“Di reminds me of you. You both have that inner strength that’s just so badass,” Scott threw her a smirk that made his eyes shine. _ Thud. Thud. _ “You’d find some stuff in common, if you met her, except she doesn’t like chocolate, and you do.”

Tessa needed a moment to catch her breath enough to respond. “Oh? Interesting,” was about as eloquent as she could do. 

“Where does she work?” she inquired, before realizing she didn’t want for it to appear like she weaseled out details about his ‘lawful spouse’ as if she were a jealous unrequited piner. Which she was, but Scott did not have to guess it. 

Scott’s eyebrow twitched. “She’s a forensic linguist at the police department,” he said. The hint of pride at his wife reappeared in his voice, as he smiled and shook his head. “I feel so inadequate sometimes, Tess. I’m only a hockey coach. She helps solve crimes nearly every day, in whatever small way she can.”

Tessa shook her head firmly. “Oh, don’t sell yourself short, come on. Your work is important on its own, as is Dina’s.” Pronouncing the woman’s name was a bit strange to Tessa. The awareness that she was married to Scott increased.

Scott smiled, and she felt him squeeze her hand lightly. _ Thud. Thud. Thud. _

“You’ve always believed in me, Tutu. Remember when you pushed me to actually apply for college, and not dive into coaching right away? I still haven’t really thanked you for that.”

“You had. You were always a wonderful friend,” she murmured, falling under the spell of his eyes with their flecks of tawny amber. Was Dina also speechless, spellbound with love whenever she looked him in the eyes? Tessa already related to the woman - not because of their supposed ‘inner strength,’ as praised by Scott, but for their shared love of the same man. 

_ Stop. Leave it alone, Virtue. This is not about Dina. This is about your stupid, immature crush. Whatever Scott thinks or says, don’t you dare reveal even a tiny part of it. It’s not fair to him and his family. _

Right then, their kids ran up to show their toys of choice. They both apparently selected sets of colorful chalk to draw on sidewalks with. Both the little boy and girl seemed most excited at the prospect of creating instant street art together.

“We’re gonna be real artists!” Tessie exclaimed.  
Scotty nodded fervently. “And we’ll become famous!”  
To which their parents could not suppress grins of endearment. They too were wistful at the sight that made them think back to their shared carefree childhood.

Scott gave a crooked smile, as he winked at Tessa, while they made their way to the counter. “Remember when I wrote ‘Happy Birthday Tessa’ on the sidewalk right below your bedroom window when you turned ten?”

Tessa chuckled. “I do. And then it rained and the writing was wiped off, but, for some reason, only the word _ Tessa _ stayed.”

Scott’s eyes were so very soft, remembering. “I was so upset when it rained. I’d snuck out of the house so I could write the message before you woke up. I had no choice but to tell you later, when you wondered why the sidewalk said ‘Tessa.’” 

He shook his head at himself, trading his nostalgia for a carefree shrug. They both moved through the line at the cashier, paying for the chalk, as Tessie and Scotty bickered in a friendly way over what to draw first when they get to do it together.

A muted ringtone sounded from Scott’s pocket, and he answered, as they got ready to leave the toy store. His eyebrows jumped up for a split second, but Tessa caught it. She understood why after a moment.

“Hey, Di! Nah, we’re just leaving the store. I ran into an old friend and her son here, by the way,” he said, smiling at Tessa, but to her, it looked more apologetic than anything else. “Oh really? Okay, that’s great, then! I’m waiting for you here. See ya.”

He hung up and looked awkward for the first time since their meeting again. “Dina says she’s nearby, since they dropped one of the girls off back home, and she thought she’d come meet me and Tessie here.” And then, more nervously, he added, “Is that okay?”

Without meaning to (but was it really?) Tessa reached out a hand to touch his. “Scott, of course it is. Why not? I’d love to meet her, if that’s the case.”

She hated how her voice acquired that false cool and collected ‘media response’ tone, but could do nothing about it. She suddenly despised having to witness him happily interacting with his family. And she despised herself for being resentful of someone she had yet to see.

When a car stopped at the entrance to the store, and a redheaded woman bounced out, with a cheerful ‘Hey there!’ and Tessie raced towards her with a shout of delight, Tessa found herself glancing at Scott. Not for the first time in their lives overall, she had the sense that his hazel eyes, beautiful and unforgettable eyes, saw right through her.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Scott is torn between the past and the present. Tessa is invited to a birthday party, with her own melancholy in tow. Someone else is making plans of their own...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I came out of my dry fic spell since the 💎news!! This is the result. All other wips to follow shortly. I hope.
> 
> Enjoy, and don't get lost in all the Tessies and Scotties 😉

_ He looked around his modest room. There was nothing cluttered or unnecessary there. It was his muse’s temple, after all. He could not bear to fill it with mundane things that would offend her presence, if she knew that her altar was surrounded by junk and trinkets. His gaze was drawn, as always, to the most beautiful space in the room, its focal point. _ Her _ face, smiling out of the myriad of images, returned his look, making him smile, too. As he did hundreds of times already, he approached the biggest framed portrait nailed to the wall to kiss his muse right on her smiling lips. No devoted believer in the world could match his love for her. His reason to live. His goddess. _

_ He spent some time watching her from a distance at her work. _

_ “Soon, my darling,” he promised her. “Very soon…” _

_ His only muse. His blessing. But his curse, too. She didn’t know that she was his, she couldn’t fathom just how _ his _ she was. She forgot about it when she’d made the mistake of running away from him that last time a few years ago. He felt, increasingly, that he needed to remind her. Yet, how could he? She was miles away from him, though luckily metaphorically speaking. Literally, she was right there, within eyeshot, and it was only a matter of some technicalities to approach her. At any time. He had to be careful, he knew as much, but he’d act soon. Very soon. _

_ Another grin lit his face, as his eyes fell on his trusty pocket knife. He knew now how he should send her a message. Remind her that fate is a good but fickle thing. And that, if fate’s patience was tried, there would be consequences. He cared only about her. Everyone else were just annoying obstacles on the way to his prized goal. _

_ Full of a burst of inspiration, he sat at the laptop, to open his newest project. He didn’t get that writing degree for nothing, he smirked to himself. And she, his beloved muse, was there to water the fountain of his creativity. It was thus their baby, a part of him with shades from her. He titled his work _ _ Opium _ _ , surprised at his spontaneous cleverness. How fitting! It was his diary, autobiography, and story of his all-encompassing love all at once. _

_ His fingers touched the keyboard. _

_ “It was his duty to remind her, his muse and love, that fate was a force to be reckoned with. She was once his, for a fleeting moment. Since then, something as laughable as a few circumstances separated them for years. _

_ No worries, my darling, the man thought. You turned so charmingly forgetful that I cannot find it in myself to be mad at you for it. After all, it was you who drew me into your being. I will be back, and we will be the happiest people the world has ever known. I will get drunk on you and allow you to do the same. Without reservation. Without limits. _

_ Your very blood is addictive, calling to the blood in my veins, and I want nothing more than to wallow in your opium.” _

_ He smiled at the words as they appeared on the screen of his laptop. He knew, if he met her, what he was going to ask her. One question. Simple and uncomplicated. Yes or no answer. Foolproof. _

_ She was many things, his muse - mysterious, alluring, distant. But she was no fool. _

_ He was positive she’d answer his question correctly. _

_ And it’d be up to him to take it from there. _

“Nice to meet you, I’m Tessa.”

“Dina. Nice to meet you as well, Tessa.”

Scott stood and watched the two of them. The woman he loved, and the woman he…loved.

Shit. Damn it. He wasn’t prepared for them to meet each other, as much as he pretended otherwise in front of Tessa and Dina. Because seeing Tessa again after all that time, being so near her and her son (he was enamored with his smaller, more boisterous namesake already) had shaken his dormant feelings for her awake, like prodding a dragon from his sleep. 

Eventually, the dragon might breathe out a destructive fire, consuming and disintegrating all of their peace and balance. Moreover, he wasn’t sure at all whether Tessa still felt anything for him. Even if she was divorced, he was still bound by duty and responsibility and, what the hell, _ love _towards his daughter and wife. No, he wouldn’t dare do anything stupid. Dina and especially Tessie did not deserve it. 

He watched the two women exchange a polite, restrained collarbone-to-collarbone hug. They looked each other in the eyes, probably recognizing the rival in the other by instinct. The athletic, trendy brunette Tessa and the pale artist’s muse that Dina was in her long dress looked at each other with considerable apprehension. Scott thought he saw _ something _dawning in Dina’s expression, when Tessa revealed her name. He did not miss the lightning-quick glance that she gave little Tessie. But his wife, ever good-natured, smiled and he could not say that the sincerity in in was forced. 

“So you and Scott go way back, huh?” Dina clarified, hugging Tessie who was clinging to her hip. Tessa nodded with a “Mmm-hmm,” and her own smile was uneasy. 

“We grew up together. I mean - I mean, on the same street here in Ilderton, in the same school,” Scott explained hurriedly. “And now we ran into each other on the playground in town.”

“That’s great,” Dina said, looking from him to Tessa. Tessie was bouncing with glee next to her as she held onto her mom’s hand. 

“Yeah, Mommy!” she enthused. “Me and Daddy and Tessa and Scott had _ bunches _of fun today! Scott and I are gonna draw on the sidewalk, we bought some chalk!” she waved her new packet of chalk at Dina.

Scott’s wife smiled, rubbing the little girl’s back affectionately. “That sounds really nice, honey. Scott is a lovely boy,” she added, now addressing Tessa. Tessa gave her a more confident grin back. 

“Thanks. I try my best with him,” she laughed, sounding proud and accomplished at being praised as a parent. 

Scott felt compelled to resolve the awkward tension, in spite of all the pleasantries. He could not stand to be there suddenly, chock-full of difficult emotions for all four of them, both the two women and children.

“Okay, I guess we’re getting ready to go now, right?” he interjected, giving Dina and their daughter an (as he hoped) cheerful smile. Dina nodded, but Tessie’s small mouth formed a pout.

“Can I play with Scott another day?” she asked regretfully.

Scotty, too, nodded along. “I don’t want for Tess to go home,” he admitted, and then the children came up to each other to share an astonishingly tight hug, like they’d been friends since the cradle. 

“Aww, buddy, it’s okay,” Tessa reassured him. “You can see Tess another time. Now she and her mommy and daddy have to go home, just like we do. But you two will definitely see more of each other. If that’s all right?” she turned to Scott and Dina, as if checking whether she overstepped a limit by promising Scotty more playtime with Tessie. 

“Oh, absolutely. ” Dina told her agreeably. “Do you have him enrolled in kindergarten? If not, I suggest you do. Ilderton reformed the one that had been low on funding, and it’s great. Our Tessie loves it,” she revealed.

Tessa nodded to that. “I actually am getting him ready for that school, but thanks for the heads up all the same,” she said to the other woman, as politely as she ever did. Scott was astonished that they had struck such a rapport, watching them converse about their children just like they were two moms on a playground. He knew that the perceptive Dina might notice something to comment to him privately, if the similarities in the two Tessas’ names counted.

The children, though, were unfazed by the complication between their parents. For all a stranger could say, they were practically siblings, from the way they interacted having barely met.

“We’re going to school together? Scott, did you hear that? We’re gonna go to the same school!” Tessie exclaimed, nudging Scotty, who responded with a wide-eyed ‘Yay! That’s great!’ The adults had to laugh at their sincere excitement of the prospect.

It was Tessa who pulled herself together first, clearing her throat softly. “Okay, then. We’d best get going - I’ve got some work to do, and Scotty here’s due for a nap. But I’ll see you all sometime later, yeah?”

Scott regained his voice, returning her smile. “Sure, Tess.” 

“Yeah, it was great to meet you, Tessa. I too hope we’ll see more of each other,” Dina interjected, holding a slightly disappointed Tessie’s hand. They said final goodbyes and parted, walking away from each other in separate directions, their kids in tow.

Then, Scott watched his daughter’s small face brightening with an idea, as her eyes looked closely into Tessa’s face. Tessie tugged on his hand, halting him. Calling after Tessa.

“Tessa? Are you and Scott coming to my Mommy’s birthday party?”

Tessa, too, stopped, looking even more hesitant. A blush flooded her cheeks; she clearly did not expect the invitation. Scott, overcome with nervousness, turned to see Dina’s reaction, first of all. Would she be dissatisfied at their daughter’s innocent idea? He had no problem with Tessa and her son attending, but this would be Dina’s day, and she was entitled to the final decision regarding guests. 

“Really, that’s sweet of you to invite me,” Tessa stammered a bit, so unlike her usual well-spokenness. “I don’t know - whether it’s -” Scott filled with a momentary amusement at how discomfited his old friend looked speaking to a three year-old.

Scotty brightened up again. “Can we, Mommy? We can bring Mrs. Moir a gift!” 

‘Mrs. Moir’ gave them a smile, looking less surprised than Scott assumed she would be, as he was busy looking between the kids and Tessa. 

“That’s actually an awesome idea. The more the merrier! That is, if you guys are free that day - that’s the twenty-fifth - you’re more than welcome to come. I don’t have a ton of people coming, so a good crowd can be more fun, and Tess will have someone to spend time with, too. What do you think?”

She’d spoken the last sentence to Scott as swiftly as she’d answered Tessie’s proposal, and he blinked. Though, of course, she asked his opinion about everything as usual, Dina was so nonchalant about this that all he answered was a hesitant, “That’s a pretty great idea. We’d love for you guys to come over, then,” taken aback at how truly okay with it she sounded.

That’s how they finally went separate ways - Tessa leading a happily chattering Scotty, Dina holding an overjoyed Tessie by the hand, talking of the future party, and Scott trailing behind his small family, puzzling over what the hell would this upcoming occasion bring into their lives. 

He kept thinking of how it felt to be near Tessa, the girl she used to be and the woman she now turned into, so different, but still fundamentally the same sweet, kind, fascinating person. 

As soon as he called her that in his mind, a dull stab of guilt pulsed through his mind. It was his wife whom he should describe using the adjectives. It was she who should leave no room for other women in his mind. 

But he loved Dina, despite everything. _ He never would have married someone he didn’t love, right? _

That’s what Scott, a self-identifying romantic sap with a belief in soulmates, told himself. He told himself so during his proposal at the park, when, on a spring picnic, he’d asked Dina to marry him, and she, giddy with happiness, threw herself at him to kiss him so hard, he swore he saw passerby filming it and cooing over how cute it was. He told himself so as he watched Dina’s mother escort her beautiful, confident daughter down the aisle towards him, and he really did feel happy to be standing there. Scott told himself so even once she told him she was pregnant. He was so ecstatic at the news that after the minutes-old baby girl was placed into his arms, he had no doubt whatsoever that he was happy. Dina had made him the happiest man, by letting him be a father. 

Since Tessie was born, he treated his wife with sincere affection, but it was also as if he tried to unconsciously apologize for suggesting to name their daughter the way they did. Dina had considered it an uncommon, unique name, and so the tiny Tessa Estelle Moir began her life named after someone from her father’s past - as well as for her flashy maternal grandmother, but it was beside the point. She was Tessie and nothing else, from the first day of her life. 

Scott smiled to himself, remembering. Unique, uncommon, unforgettable. Dina was exactly right. Tessie stood out among the Kaylynns, Ashleighs, and even a Daenerys in her daycare and kindergarten. She was a ray of sunshine and a sweet-voiced sprite who never turned down an occasion to cause her parents innocent trouble. 

Dina was a wonderful mother, but she, an only child, had perhaps a greater sense of responsibility than did the fun uncle and no less fun father Scott. Where she’d patiently and firmly explain to Tessie why she had to finish her soup or main course before having sweets, Scott more than once had taken pity on those hazel puppy eyes and that _ pwease, Daddee? _when she was smaller to sneak her a piece of chocolate. He definitely was the more lenient parent, even though he turned out as good a father as she was a mother. Maybe that’s why they worked together perfectly well in raising their daughter. 

Yet...no matter how much Scott respected and loved Dina in his own way, he knew it would be quite a stretch to call her his soulmate. No matter that he also knew that it was not necessary to marry one's ‘soulmate’,’ whatever that means in real life. Dina just...suited him, he mused. No more and no less.

_ For the rest of your life? _his mind butted in skeptically.

_ Too late to think about that. Besides, you wouldn’t change it for the world, any of it. Not least of all because of your amazing child. _

“Daddy? We’re home.”

His daughter’s sweet voice pulled him out of musing. Tessie had been swinging her legs, tugging on his sleeve. “We’re home now! And I’m hungry.”

Scott caught Dina’s good-natured smirk in the driver’s mirror, as she parked the car. “And Daddy looks like he’s sleepy,” she teased. 

He gave a slightly awkward chuckle in return. He’d been so consumed by thoughts of Tessa and of his family that he’d zoned out through the short drive from the toy store home. 

“I’m just kind of tired. This little energizer bunny was quite the partner in crime today,” he said affectionately, giving Tessie a kiss on the forehead, while unbuckling her out of her car seat. He took Tessie and several of the shopping bags up the stairs to the front door and unlocked it, Dina following.

“Four years and I can’t get over what a gentleman you are,” she murmured, stopping him to kiss him. Scott smiled, drawing his arm around her as he put Tessie and the shopping bags down. 

“Only for you, Di,” he affirmed, feeling a wave of true affection for the woman. But did she really not notice anything out of the ordinary between him and Tessa? If so, she was willing to possibly let slide the unsaid and the implications that were there, and he wasn’t sure he wanted her to suspect him of being capable of cheating. Not just because (of course) he wanted his wife to think he was a morally correct man, and also because she did not deserve to deal with the torment of suspecting and assuming. He cared for Dina, not in an overwhelmingly loving way, but still from a place of love and appreciation. He wouldn’t do anything to break her trust.

He wouldn’t.

So why did Tessa, _ his _Tessa of the past, fly back into his life, and change it without even changing it yet?

Dina blinked at him. “Hey, why that frown, baby?” Her small fingers stroked his forehead lines. Scott reverted to an easy smile, pecking her on the lips once more. “You know what? I don’t know how to tell you, but…” She raised her eyes at him, full of sudden apprehension.

“What is it, Scott?” Her voice wavered the tiniest bit.

He sighed. “The thing is...you have beautiful eyes.” A smile tugged at his lips as he spoke. It was a harmless prank that he played on her sometimes, and they both enjoyed it. 

Dina gasped, smacking his arm as she wriggled out of his hug. “Jerk! I always fall for the same sappy crap!” Her laughter was a contrast to her fake-offended tone, and Scott joined in, leaning for still another kiss. 

“Hey,” a small voice interrupted, and they looked down to see Tessie’s indignant expression and adult-like crossed arms. “Daddy, stop kissing Mommy! I’m _ so _hungry!” 

Scott and Dina exchanged looks and erupted with chuckles at their daughter’s bossiness.

“All right, Miss Tessa, lead the way,” Dina grinned, winking at Scott. 

He sighed. He was a fool for whining and pining over things he was unable to change. He had everything that made him happy right there, personified by his lovely wife and his disarmingly adorable child.

It would be stupid of him to tempt fate and jinx whatever consistent positivity he already had.

“So,” Scott remembered later that evening, “did you end up buying anything cool today?”

It was after they washed the dinner dishes, done a bit of work, and played with Tessie before her bedtime. He had thought to ask it both because he was mildly curious, and to try and distract Dina, if possible, from awkward conversations about Tessa and her son. Though it was definitely not the most honorable and honest thing to do, he scowled at his reflection in the master bathroom. Later. He’d tell Dina all about it later. He promised as much, if to himself. Meanwhile, he heard the faint rustle of bedsheets, coming out to the bedroom. 

“Wouldn’t _ you _like to know what I bought?”

Dina was reclining on their king-sized bed, in a seductive pose, and answering him in a very un-Dina-like purr. Usually it was all, ‘Hey, wanna do it?’ with the innocent bravado of a teenage girl ‘doing it’ with her boyfriend. No accessories or gadgets, barely any lustful grabbing and growling. Straight-up ‘take this off me and let’s go to bed.’ Less often the couch or the shower (much less often now, considering Tessie). And they both were fine with it, more than fine. Great, even. 

Now, Dina was dressed in a clearly new silver-toned nightgown, the color a perfect match for her gray eyes. He met her inviting gaze, raising a curious eyebrow. “If you want to know my opinion, it makes your eyes go ka-pow,” he pointed out, strolling up to the bed. 

A snort from her, followed by a peal of laughter. _ “Ka-pow?” _ she repeated, incredulously. Scott grinned and sat on the edge of the bed.

“That’s right,” he said, wrapping his arm loosely around her waist. Dina tilted her head quizzically. Her breath tickled his mouth, and he knew what was about to happen. To say that Scott wasn’t in the mood would be a lie, but he felt no passionate desire, either. Just two married friends doing adult activities for mutual enjoyment. He almost laughed at how accurately he defined it.

“Do you know what makes my heart go ka-pow?” Her lips were closer. Why couldn’t he make the first move? It was easy as breathing, after four years of marriage. Suddenly there was a strange barrier preventing him from kissing his own damn wife.

She did turn him on, with that graceful body of hers, the body of a past zumba instructor (he could almost span her waist with both of his hands). He adored running his fingers through her hair. He loved her, truly, his earthly mermaid. All the more strange to know why on this particular night, he just wasn’t as...hungry for it. Possibly also because he had no idea how he was going to look Tessa in the eye again if he dared enjoy sleeping with his wife. 

Stupid. So stupid of him.

_ Kiss your wife already, idiot. _

But she wouldn’t be his confident, take-charge Dina if she didn’t lean to him first. Scott closed his eyes and fell into the kiss as if jumping from a plane. With a parachute. But still.

Then, her hand was inside his underwear and his palm was under her nightie, and he had no time to think. Until…

He had no idea how, abruptly, he had seen her gray eyes, the pupils wide from pleasure, changing into green for the briefest instant. _ Screw that, _he thought, anger shooting through his mellow enjoyment. He pressed his lips harder to Dina’s, until she made that purr again, straddling him snugly and moving him to lie underneath her. But the only thing he accomplished with this more insistent kiss was to kiss Tessa harder.

He grunted, and Dina must have taken that as a sign of him liking it. “Good, yeah?”

Her little smirk would have been sexy in other cases, except Scott strained up to kiss her again, determined to banish the ridiculously untimely image of Tessa from his mind. He was cheating on his wife already. He wasn’t doing anything but having sex with her, and he still was cheating. 

He allowed Dina to take the reins. He allowed her to roll the condom onto his erection. He allowed himself to sink deep inside her. He allowed himself to reciprocate her thrusts, but he clung to her, trying his best to be in the moment with _ this _ woman, to stop betraying her without really doing so, guilt mixed with his pleasure to the point that it became strange and he grew full of an urgent need to be _ done _already. When he came, following her, as usual, he did it on autopilot, like hearing the end of a song he’d listened to many times. 

Dina was slowly coming out of her haze. She grinned and pecked him on the lips, before putting her head back on his shoulder.

“I love you so much.”

Scott buried his nose into the crown of her head. He inhaled and exhaled methodically, hearing his heart calming down beat by beat, and sensing that he was sweaty all over not just from exertion, but from nervousness.

“Do you love me?”

It was almost an afterthought - a pleasant rhetorical question of habit. _ God, if only she knew what I thought of, the douchebag. She wouldn’t love me so much if she did. She is a saint. And you sure as hell do not deserve her, Scott. Not her selfless love. _

Scott held a pause. “Of course I love you, Di,” he murmured back, after a careful examination of the ceiling. He’d begun to let the pause wear on a little longer every time before reciprocating Dina’s sentiment as of recently. He just did not understand why.

Now he did. After seeing Tessa again. After knowing that she was somewhere not too far from him once more.

And Dina had no idea.

Her content, sleepy sigh was a period finally completing a very long, convoluted sentence. He carded his fingers through her long red tresses, touching them like a warm cashmere blanket. A comfort object. Something familiar and reassuring. 

He never got to have whom he loved, so he had to love whomever he was with.

He absolutely hated that for himself. He hated that for his two women even more - the one that was his, and the never-was and never-would-be his. 

*

Tessa entered the small, tidy yard, Scotty following. She was holding the little boy’s hand and Dina’s present in the with no small amount of anxiety. She thought idly what, if anything, did Scott’s wife say about her to him after their meeting two weeks ago. Would she consider her a strange potential ‘other woman’ from his past? Did she care that Tessa’s son and Scott shared a name, and so did Tessie and her adult namesake? Dina was so astonishingly inviting with her support of Tessie’s suggestion that Tessa be a guest at her birthday celebration. It was going to be strange - but hopefully, without incidents. 

She, too, pondered what, if anything, to give Dina. She could not exactly breeze into a store and ask ‘So...what’s a nice, thoughtful birthday gift for my childhood crush’s wife?’ After some deliberation, she’d settled on a pretty card (if her clothes were any indication, Dina seemed to favor pastel colors) and a gift certificate to one of the stores from where she’d shopped, as far as Tessa could judge from the photo Scott showed her. 

A guilty but enticing thought occurred to her while she dressed. As she tugged on a simple but flattering pair of jeans and an off-the-shoulder red blouse with blue calico flowers she wondered what Scott would think of _ her _as compared to his wife. Dina showed absolutely no sign of having ever been pregnant, though her overt youthfulness may have been due to the fact that (Tessa assumed) she was a few years younger than Scott. Tessa had never had any severe insecurities concerning her body, but her wider midsection and chest area - souvenirs from Scotty - were a glaring sign of a mother in her thirties. Looking at herself in the mirror, Tessa pursed her lips, nearly burning with shame for the thoughts. She had no right to assume Scott still found her attractive, much less compared her appearance to that of his wife. Yet, for all her clothes were smart casual at most, she found herself lining her eyes in a way that Scott had said ‘make them go ka-pow’ (when she turned sixteen and wanted to fit in better with the cool girls in her class). She also spritzed on the perfume she’d worn since early adolescence - a sweet, candy-like strawberry scent (once, when they were tipsy and laughing over everything and nothing on his - or her - couch, Scott confessed that he could pick her out of a ten thousand-people crowd, strictly because of that fragrance).

Tessa sighed at her reflection. She liked who looked back at her out of the mirror. She just did not want to appear like a conniving mistress type. Even if Scott went down on one knee and professed his undying love to Dina in front of the party crowd, she would grin at them along with everyone. As his friend, first and foremost, his happiness was of utmost importance. There was also his sweet daughter, little Tessie. Named after herself. The innocent child was the last to deserve potential anguish if she caused a rift between her parents.

“Mama! You look so pretty! And you smell like candy!” 

A high boyish voice exclaimed it, not for the first time. Scotty came up to her and hugged her leg, grinning at her. She beamed back, pinching his cheek; remarking with a bittersweet awareness that it had traded baby-like chubbiness for a more defined toddler shape. Her baby boy was growing…

“Thank you, honey,” she said, affectionately. Scotty giggled when she threw on a silly pose for him.

“You’re even prettier than Mrs. Moir!”

Tessa raised her eyebrows, her mouth drying. _ Prettier than...Alma? Scotty had never met Scott’s mother! _The absurdly confusing moment passed until another pang of regret made her realize Scotty had meant Dina. 

_ You know. The wife of the man for whom you’re wearing the perfume and eyeliner and borderline suggestive neckline. High time for you to get used to her being called that. _

“Now, let’s not talk like that, sonny. Everyone is pretty in their own way,” she admonished her son lightly, ruffling his light brown hair. The little boy’s warm green eyes, so like hers, blinked up at her, taking in her motherly wisdom. “You must try to remember that. Okay?”

“Okay, Mama,” Scotty replied, ever her easygoing, agreeable boy. “Am I pretty?” he flashed her another grin, and Tessa grinned back.

“Of course you are. You’re the prettiest and smartest!”

Scotty erupted with sweet giggling as she hoisted him up and gave him several smacking kisses on the cheeks, and giggled harder still as she pretended to fly him like an airplane to the hallway where they’d put on their shoes and set out to the party.

The event did go smoothly, to the relief of the three adults central to it. Tessa mingled with several of Scott and Dina’s coworkers, introducing herself by the unassuming description of ‘childhood friend.’ The birthday woman turned out to be the master of child management, introducing all the kids to each other so they could play. 

“Oh, just Aunt Dina, sweetie,” she said to Scotty, in response to him calling her ‘Mrs. Moir.’ Scotty grinned and so did Scott, kissing his wife on the cheek in appreciation. Tessa didn’t like her heart getting a stab of envy over it. Not one bit. Dina accepted Tessa’s modest present with grace and kindness, too - and it made her that much harder to dislike. Tessa firmly resolved to be at least kind in return.

Sighing into her champagne glass, she looked around the yard for a diversion. That came in the person of none other than Danny Moir, who’d come with his wife and children.

“My other favorite T!” he boomed, pulling her into a hug like a long-lost sister. “What have you been up to all this time, eh?”

Tessa chuckled and told him some of it.

“Your boy?” Danny asked, pointing out Scotty who frolicked with Tessie around the yard, accompanied by Danny’s and Dina’s friend’s children. 

“That’s him,” smiled Tessa, nodding. Her gaze strayed to Scott, who leaned towards Dina and whispered something, making her smile. The jealousy in her spiked again. 

“What’s his name?”

Tessa glanced to Danny, looking back at her expectantly. Making sure that she did not sigh audibly this time, she said it. “Scott Jordan Virtue.” She’d changed her son’s name from _ Foster _after her philandering husband, to her maiden name, as soon as her divorce process completed.

A glint appeared in Danny’s eye at that, like he was no more than forty-something going on twenty. “Scott, huh?”

Tessa gave him a sharp glare, all casual friendliness forgotten. “Yes. It’s not a weird thing to name your kids after your friends,” she retorted, her tone very narrowly avoiding a snap. Danny took the faint warning in stride. “Okay, Tess,” he conceded, raising his palms slightly. “No hard feeling at all. After all, my baby niece was named after you, too.”

Danny’s enigmatic smile did little to make her uneasiness fade.

As the party ended and the guests left, Dina had gone to check the mailbox. There was the traditional fancy card from Estelle, her mother, who lived in Montreal. Scott watched his wife smile a trifle sadly as she read the few lines penned inside the card. Estelle hadn’t visited since Tessie’s first birthday, but she claimed to love her daughter and her husband and child. Dina and Scott decided to give her the benefit of the doubt, if to keep the peace in the family.

Dina had begun to close the small gate, when she saw _ it. _

“What’s this? Is it for me?”

Scott watched as she picked up a bouquet of fiery red poppies, swathed in black tissue paper. Frowning, she brought it to him and they read the small attached card.

_ For my love, _was all it said.

Dina turned to Scott. “Scott. If this was you, it’s sweet and I don’t want to be ungrateful, but honestly, I don’t like poppies.” She regarded the flowers almost as if they were poisonous. “They make me feel...bad.”

Scott knew that like his own name. Dina told him she disliked wildflowers, specifically poppies, and he made sure never to give her them. 

“That wasn’t me. I swear, Di. I know you don’t like them,” he told her defensively.

Relief overcame her face. “Thank God. It’s just someone’s dumb prank.” Before he could say anything else, she marched over to the nearest garbage can and shoved the bouquet inside.

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry to anyone whose name is Kailyn, Ashley, or hell even Daenerys😀all your names are valid and unique!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dina tries her best to understand her husband, as an unforeseen event in Ilderton stuns the town and everyone in it.

_ He was beside himself with rage and insult. How dare she do that? He’d reached out to her, given her a token of his affection, and she? She threw it away like yesterday’s rotten garbage. She discarded the flowers he’d picked out specifically for her. He knew it was her birthday - the date was seared into his brain to the point that he had it as his phone password. He’d gone to the florist to choose the most beautiful bouquet. Poppies. They were special just for the two of them. _

_ He paced back and forth, back and forth across his room. Smoked cigarette after cigarette. _

_ With a toss of her arm, she threw not only the bouquet into that dirty dumpster. She’d dumped his own heart inside there, too. _

_ Not a muse. A stupid, selfish bitch. _

_ He strode up to the wall with her photographs and slammed his pocket knife into the middle of her face. Serves her right. How dare she treat him like that? How dare she refuse his love? _

_ He ended up going outside. Maybe a walk would clear his head and soothe his bleeding heart. _

_ He saw her on accident, as he passed the Baptist church building. She was walking purposefully a few feet in front of him. By that point, he’d calmed down a bit, having walked around the town vicinities for an hour. When he saw her, doubt replaced his anger. What if she’d just made a mistake and rashly disposed of his gift, without meaning to? What if everything was different right now? _

_ Hope surged in his mind again. He decided to approach her and ask her his most important, most anxious question. He stuck his hand into his pocket, feeling something soft. A single poppy. He didn’t know how it got there. _

_ All he cared about was catching up to her. Looking her in the eye. Speaking to her. If she answered the question the way he expected and accepted the flower. _

_ So, he approached her. She startled a bit, when he looked her in the eye. Then, he took a deep breath, and went for it. _

_ Asked her the question. _

_ She giggled, and answered. Went on her merry way, leaving his mute, shocked self behind. _

_ She had the nerve to fucking giggle. _

_ The flame of fury in his chest roared back to life. He shoved his hand into his pocket and felt the familiar cool handle. _

_ The stupid idiot just signed herself a death sentence, and none of it was his fault. _

_ He tore down the small distance between them, grabbed her shoulder, and let the blade slice into her throat. _

_ He didn’t remember anything that happened afterwards. Not even how he stumbled back home, fleeing the scene, locking the door behind him, and passed out in bed, not bothering to wash himself. _

_ The next morning, he stared at his own bloodshot eyes and ghastly face, and felt himself grin. Everyone had to know how clever he was. How inventive. _

_ He sat at the table, but instead of opening the secret file on his laptop, he opened a blank Word document and began to type. _

Geraldine Morris considered herself a happy and even lucky woman. A cozy, beautiful home, a rewarding (if challenging) career in a small-town police department, a handsome and doting husband, and an adorable daughter. At thirty, Dina already had it all, and she wasn’t afraid to admit that and be grateful for it.

She remembered the time she’d met Scott as well as if it had been yesterday. It was a completely chance encounter as she, a fresh-faced twenty-two year-old, recently graduated Criminology major, brought her young nephew Dylan, her cousin’s son, to hockey practice. She hadn’t had a chance to glimpse the rink at the beginning of practice, as her nephew (at nine, he was in his first ‘independent’ stage) hugged her and ran off to his buddies in sport. But then an hour later, as she returned for the boy, she found them all being carefully dismissed in an organized manner. None of the boys seemed too eager to leave the rink yet, least of all Dylan. They all flocked around the coach, an older, but still youthful-looking man. Dina smiled, letting herself enjoy the sight of his good looks - especially the tousled dark hair and easy smile, warming up the cold atmosphere of the rink. He laughed as he answered the questions and comments flying at him from each of the boys. Then, as the other parents began to file in, he spared a word or two for them as well, letting the designated child go with his guardian. At last, Dylan’s turn came to say goodbye, and Dina walked up to the edge of the rink, calling out for him.

The coach turned to face her and their eyes met. Dina was transfixed, if only for a second, by his unique eyes. Not green, not brown; an intricately hued hazel. 

He’d walked up to her first and greeted her. She answered in kind, and the rest was history. Scott asked her out the next time she came to pick up Dylan. 

“Doing anything fun this weekend?” he inquired casually, leaning against the boards. Dina grasped where he was going with the question. She was ready for it.

“Not really. Why?” 

He smiled in response to her, pretending to furrow his brow in thought.

“Well...I wanted to ask you out,” he admitted, with that charming smile of his. It was flattering. Very much so. Dina thought she’d be stupid not to go out with such an attractive, charismatic guy. Even once. She tilted her head, however, flirting naturally without really meaning to. 

“Have you asked me whether I want to be asked out?” 

Giving Scott a moment to see the humor in her comment, she followed up with laughter, and he joined her.

The rest, of course, was history. Dina was charmed by the older man (she cringed to call him that privately, but their nine-year age difference was something to account for). 

They had clicked with remarkable smoothness. For all Scott had swept her off her feet for the first time in her adult life, it was great to be around him. Eventually, the fascination gave way for her into strong infatuation and something very much like love. She _ was _ thrilled when he proposed. She felt ready, in spite of being only twenty-five at the time. 

Her mother had been much less excited. 

Estelle was a very pretty and outgoing woman and, in a cliched way, often mistaken for her own daughter’s older sister. At the age of eighteen, she’d had a turbulent relationship with her high school boyfriend, unintentionally falling pregnant with Dina as soon as their final exams were over. The boy, of course, left to university across the country when she told him about the baby. Since then, Estelle referred to men in no other way than ‘selfish bastards’ until she met the man who would become Dina’s stepfather. 

Christopher Morris was a divorced teacher in Dina’s class. Estelle and he married after just under a year of secret parent-teacher dating. Chris, the brother of four siblings, became enamored with Dina from the start, calling her ‘my very Geri girl,’ so affectionately, in contrast to Estelle’s rather cool Quebecois _ ‘cherie Geri.’ _

Dina only had ten years with the stepfather she came to love like her own parent, closer still to him also because he and her mother never had children of their own. She always suspected that, no matter how her stepdad might have wanted kids with her mom, he just went along with her decision on the matter. Chris died abruptly and horribly - collapsed from a heart attack after a tennis match with Dina herself. They’d never missed their father-daughter outing every Sunday, though she was now a grown college girl of nineteen. 

She wept inconsolably for weeks.

Estelle registered herself on a dating website after hardly waiting the decent mourning period. It wasn’t because she did not care about her husband’s death. She just loved men too much, and Dina always marveled at the contrast of Estelle calling them ‘selfish bastards’ and favoring men who were almost her daughter’s age. 

Except, when Dina and Scott got engaged, she had to endure Estelle’s grim predictions of Scott trading her for a ‘sexy young thing’ a decade into the marriage. 

“He’s not _ that _much older, Maman,” Dina protested. “My age is the last reason he wants to marry me.”

Her mother shook her head. “Do whatever you want, Geri. Just make sure it’s what you really want, _ d’accord?” _

That was as much of a blessing as Estelle would give her daughter. Dina loved her mother, obviously, and knew that she was loved as a daughter too. But her mother acted too much like her 40-something year-old best friend, instead of a parent; and, when the time came to actually parent - give advice, support and have deep conversations - Estelle did so in a clumsy, almost inexperienced manner. 

Maybe that was why Dina just narrowly avoided tangling herself with _ that guy. _Well, it had little to do with her mother, if she was fair, but...

She disliked to remember him, never mind discussing him with anyone else. Telling Scott anything about it was out of the question. Dina was so relieved to have landed a normal, good man that she resolved to keep him near her at all costs. She kept telling herself that she’d made a mistake only because she was young and stupid, and got out of it luckily unscathed. 

Scott wasn’t like _ that one _ had been. At all. Funny, smart, caring, and selfless, he was a winning lottery ticket among the rusty pennies. Before she met him, she wished she was like her mother, who raised casual flings to an art. Estelle never depended on men, not even her late husband with whom she’d lived for a decade. Her mother was never afraid to break up with a boyfriend. As much as Dina didn’t think she herself was hung up on a man, she knew that Scott was good enough to live her life with.

Did she love him? She had long since stopped feeling guilty and confused on the subject. She enjoyed his company - with him there was lots to talk about, and lots to be comfortably silent about, too. Yes, she was attracted to him, and she knew the feeling was mutual, but she could not call that love. For all anyone knew, they were two friends who suddenly decided to get married, it being convenient for both parties. 

When Tessie was born, she was overjoyed as much as Scott was. As an only child, Dina had always secretly longed for a sweet baby sister or brother, and that half-maternal longing manifested itself in Tessie. By that time, she was already making a name for herself at the Ilderton Police department, but her brief maternity leave did not interfere in it, thank Scott’s mother. Alma willingly came over for months, and helped care for her newest granddaughter, and it carried beyond Tessie's first months. She sang songs, braided the child’s hair as she got older and took her to the park, and meal-prepped to an impressive degree, for the entire family, among other things. Dina felt blessed with the help of this woman who was so clearly _ meant _ to be an adoring grandma. Scott, too, doted on his daughter with zeal, from the very first minute.

The years passed, Tessie grew, and their small family continued to be strong and happy. Dina asked no details about Scott’s ‘past life’ either, and was content not to know. It was only fair, she supposed.

Until her recent meeting of Tessa Virtue.

It wasn’t hard at all for Dina to deduce Tessa’s influence on Scott. She understood his past attachment to this woman even more when Tessa’s son’s name was revealed to be nothing else but _ Scott. _ Adorable little Scotty, who took to friendship with their Tessie like a duckling to water.

Strangely enough, Tessa wasn’t at all like the cliched character of a homewrecker - a calculating, two-faced woman out to seduce unavailable men on a whim. Tessa was rather a sweet, good-natured fellow mom from daycare and kindergarten - someone Dina actually saw herself befriending. She was open, sincere, and humble. She’d even given her an earnest, thoughtful gift for her birthday, while theoretically being the last person to think about presents for someone like her crush’s spouse. 

And yes, all of this led her to think about Scott. She had no choice but to think about him.

Like practically any wife, Dina saw that Tessa was to Scott so much more than the ‘childhood friend’ of their mutual description. His eyes wore such a soft gaze whenever he looked at Tessa that it rivaled the expression he’d had on their wedding day. That and Tessie’s name choice three years ago led Dina to believe that both he and Tessa had mutual romantic feelings for each other long ago, which had never been acted on for some reason, and which resurfaced without warning upon their meeting again. Scott’s eyes _ sparkled _ with adoration, even in her presence, when he looked at Tessa. Dina never got adoration - affection, friendliness, or basic attraction were all her prerogatives. She didn’t particularly want to be ‘adored’ anyway. All she wanted was security and reassurance. Trust. It was enough for her. Adoration could go screw itself, for all she was concerned, after dealing with _ him. _

An unbidden thought popped into her mind on a random morning, while she got Tessie ready for daycare.

What if Scott and Tessa _ did _ start an affair?

For all Dina knew Tessa was the only candidate in that scenario, she also had no idea as to her clear opinions and reaction if it really did happen in the end. She supposed that Scott deserved more than a steady, lukewarm marriage to her, and that he would act out on it out of desperation, pent-up longing, anything really. A starry-eyed romantic like him wanted passion, and, as much as they were ardent in their physical relationship, she also knew that they truly did not have passion. Not because it fizzed out after four years. It was the way they were.

But also, how would they even go about divorce? What would Tessie think of her parents separating, out of the blue, and a stepmother entering the picture? Tessie was only just shy of four years old, smack-dab in the ‘fairytales before bed’ stage. To her, Daddy was King and Mommy was Queen, and they loved one another and her, their little princess who drew pictures and slayed bad wizards in her spare time. Her parents splitting would be too difficult and very likely hurtful for her still so young brain.

Most of all, Dina liked being married to Scott. She liked the comfort and the easiness. She knew how odd it was for a woman of thirty to think so, and yet she truly felt like it. Scott was a good husband, a wonderful father. A cherished friend, though they happened to wear matching rings and share parenthood to a child. 

The elephant in the room remained there, and she carefully broached the subject the night after her birthday. She mostly jumped to talk about it because she needed distraction after that unwelcome bouquet, those damned _ poppies, _showed up outside their house.

Dina knew only one person who’d give her that type of flower. She nearly swore out loud then, when she’d picked it up, only censoring herself because Tessie was still running around the twilight-darkened yard. No, she told herself, panicked, there was no way. It was a prank, a stupid prank. 

Luckily, Scott never asked her about it, not even when he watched her throw away the bouquet. She kind of hated herself for it, hated so much for not telling him the whole story, not just ‘I really dislike poppies.’ But also, she did not know why she panicked at the sight of the offending fiery blooms. In spite of them being her undesired and unpleasant link to _ him, _ she scolded herself for being ridiculous. It wasn’t him leaving them, that had to be impossible. That part of her life had stayed (and most likely died) in Montreal. He had threatened to kill himself, didn’t he, she thought darkly. She did not want to feel guilty over _ that _either, so she forced it back into the furthermost corner of her mind.

Putting on her best breezy, nonchalant smile, she then approached Scott as they moved to the living room couch to have glasses of leftover champagne before bed.

“So...Tessa, huh?”

Scott jerked his head towards her, his eyebrows jumping in clear guilt. He took a sip of champagne, as if to steady himself before telling a secret.

“She’s just a friend, Di. I swear. That’s it. That has only ever been it, in fact,” he blurted, and she felt sorry at once for how defensive he, again, sounded. She felt like a friend as well, now, as she placed her hand on his shoulder, pulling her legs up to sit near him.

“Scott, that’s okay. It’s okay to admit you have feelings for her. I won’t throw tantrums, I won’t fling accusations at you,” she soothed. Her Scott, always so funny and outgoing and confident, sounded so timid. She scolded herself silently for making him anxious, and hoped she could convince him that she wouldn’t act like a stereotypical jealous wife.

He opened his mouth, but she beat him to it, as gently as possible. “Yes, I know you would never hurt me or Tessie. I just want you to be happy.”

Scott blinked. “But I am...I am happy…” he trailed off, swirling the champagne in his glass. Dina put hers on the coffee table and scooted to wrap her arm around his waist. 

“I just want you to know that I want you to be even happier. I can’t tell you what that means right now, and I can’t sort my own feelings about it right now either. I just don’t want you to think I’m going to be angry if...if anything ever happens.”

She was amazed at her own selflessness. She herself was coaxing her husband into her supposed rival’s arms! But, primarily, Scott was her friend. Her dear friend. Why not reassure him that she won’t turn spiteful if he can’t help but succumb to his renewed love?

Scott choked out, “Oh, Di,” and grasped her tightly. Dina sighed and moved her arms around him, too. _ Her poor torn husband. _ Damn, what did she have that attracted all the lost sheep? First _ that one, _now this one who should have been older and wiser, but was honestly a lovesick boy.

“I don’t deserve you,” he rambled in her ear. “Hell, a coward like me never deserved her either.”

“Shh, babe. It’s okay,” was all she whispered back. Strangely loving and comforting in her own way. They would all be okay. They just had to be.

Tessa was just finishing her morning coffee and letting Scotty sleep in for a few more minutes, when Ilderton Watch, a Facebook page detailing all the events and news in town, displayed the post that she never expected to see in the always peaceful town.

_"22 year-old found dead...unknown murderer...if you know anything connected to this _ _horrible_ _ crime, don't hesitate to contact the Ilderton _ _Police Department..."_

She gasped, feeling tears spring into her eyes. How could this happen? Here, of all places? The poor girl...

"Mama? You okay?"

Her son had come down to the kitchen on his own, adorably sleepy, rubbing his eyes. She grabbed Scotty and hugged him as close to herself as she could, to stop the trembling fear from seeping into her bones.

Dina forgot all about Scott and Tessa's and her complicated situation three days after. What happened at work made her forget _ everything _that didn’t have to do with what shocked all of Ilderton.

That day, her colleague, energetic and jokes-cracking Leonard Mitchell, greeted her with the barest hint of a smile, instead of a big, goofy grin of usual. Dina tensed immediately, sensing that his reason for lack of smiling wasn’t just in a sudden bad mood. Neither did he offer her a cup of blueberry tea, her favorite, which he’d always made for her as he got himself coffee. Her other coworkers at the station teased them of being ‘work hubby and wifey’ but both Leo and Dina brushed them off. Privately, though, she had suspected that Leo’s camaraderie had a good dose of something less platonic, but today, she wouldn’t think of it nor any other flippant subjects. Just the abrupt, horrible crime that she’d discover in a few minutes.

“Leo? Did anything happen?”

She stared into the man’s eyes, as they clouded further. He sighed.

“Hannah from Vanilla Cloud has been found dead near the Baptist church outside town.”

She felt her eyes widen; felt how numb her limbs got from the abject shock and fear. “Hannah…” What the hell was her last name? She racked her brain for a second, remembering. “Hannah Klein?”

“Right,” Leo confirmed tersely, as she followed him into the office, hardly registering that she was walking at all. _ Hannah. The always laughing, chatty redhead, who’d worked in the cafe for a few years. Killed. _

“But...how? Who...why?” Dina struggled to make sense of it. Even the old guard at the Ilderton station never remembered a murder actually happening in the calm, steady-paced town. 

Leo opened the office door, waiting for her to get in. “We know the _ how, _so far. That...whoever did it was like a rabid animal tearing out of a cage.” Here, her colleague paled himself, describing the ghastly killing, as he sat on the chair opposite her. “He’d slit her throat with so much violence, they said it’s a miracle he didn’t decapitate her. They found the blade near the body. It broke off the handle.”

Dina closed her eyes, fighting a wave of nausea. “Shit.” 

He nodded grimly. “The pastor of the church also brought a note from the killer, apparently. He threw it into the mailbox.”

_ “What?” _

She opened her mouth, at a loss, as Leo handed her a plastic sleeve-covered sheet of paper. The twisted mockery of the typed sentences was chilling.

_ Hey, preacher! It was I who committed murder right next to your church. I’m waiting for my feat to be announced in the local news. If not, I can cut a few more sluts. Maybe even kids, too! And no bullshit, either. If I smell a single cop, your own precious little house of God will go up in smoke, and I don’t care who will be in it. The choice is yours. _

_ MY NAME IS OPIUM _

"There was this, too."

Dina shuddered, tearing her eyes away from the paper with the cruel words. Leo showed her a tiny plastic bag. In it was a half-crushed red flower petal.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tessa and Scott struggle to parent in a time of tension and fear, increasingly failing to battle their hidden feelings. Dina has a realization.

“Daddy, how come I don’t have to go to school today?”

Tessie was pouting at breakfast, hardly paying attention to her favorite oatmeal with raspberry jam. The little girl had already fallen in love with her daycare routine, not the least because Scotty Virtue was now enrolled in the same group. Both children had bonded to an astonishing degree, always sitting together in class, taking over lockers side-by-side, and playing chiefly with the other, even if their games included other kids. 

Scott smiled at his daughter, brushing a small strand of brown hair from her forehead. “It’s because the schools are closed for a while, T,” he explained. To that, Tessie only tilted her head, shrugging.

“But why? Is anyone sick?” she asked again. The year before, daycares had had a short vacation during a flu outbreak in schools and other caretaking centers in Ilderton. How to explain to a small child that this time, a deranged murderer threatened to start killing children, if his cynical desire for recognition was not met? So many of the parents were scared that the daycares opted to close temporarily rather than risk tempting fate. 

Scott sighed, trying to find the appropriate wording that would be evasive but also to satisfy Tessie so she would ask no more. “It’s just that the teachers decided to take a vacation for a little while,” he told her. 

“But  _ why?”  _ Tessie insisted, ever more curious. 

Scott shot a helpless glance to Dina, who was getting ready while also monitoring Tessie with some concern, since the little girl seemed uninterested in breakfast. Dina smiled, yet Scott was able to notice that it did not reach her eyes. His wife has been shaken by the murder most of all, since she had come home from work on that tragic day. She had almost cried, telling him of the murdered Hannah Klein, and Scott grew afraid that his wife herself could be in danger, given that she was a woman as well, and thus a possible target for the unpredictable killer. Yes, Dina was well-versed in self-defense as a worker for the police department, but there was no way of telling if she would survive an encounter with the unknown predator. He clearly craved blood and fame, as was obvious from his message, and would stop at nothing to get it, even harming a group of defenseless children. 

Now, both Dina and Scott struggled to put on a carefree demeanor in front of their innocent, small daughter. 

Dina spoke up first. “Well, the teachers wanted to have a break because...well, because even teachers should take breaks sometimes. Like you and I and Daddy did last year, remember?”

Tessie’s face brightened up. “Ohh! Like when we went camping and had picnics!”

Dina and Scott laughed, mostly from the relief from the tension with the unsaid, and because they managed to wrestle the little girl’s attention towards a more carefree direction. 

“Yep, something like that,” said Scott, stroking Tessie’s hair. 

“Now, finish your breakfast, and Daddy will take you to work. Don’t you want to go to work with Daddy, sweetie?” Dina smiled, as Tessie pushed her spoon around her bowl.

Tessie lit up still brighter. “To work with Daddy? At the rink?”

“That’s right, little one. I’m taking you to the rink for the entire teacher break!” Scott cheered, and Tessie joined him, as he gave her a bear hug. 

Dina watched the scene with affection, but her smile was sad. They were masking the forced removal of Tessie from daycare during a dangerous time as a fun vacation from school, when it was not fun in reality. Whatsoever. 

As they approached the door together, Scott stopped his wife. Looked her in the eyes and took both her hands in his. He did care so much for her, and knew he would hardly survive it if the slightest thing had happened to her or worse yet, their baby girl. 

“Di, be careful out there. Please,” he insisted, for the dozenth time. Dina rolled her eyes strictly for comic relief. She was nearly sick with anxiety. Not for herself, either. 

_ Our daughter might be in danger because of me. Because I had done something I shouldn’t have, in the past. _

But she sighed and smiled again, leaning up to kiss him softly. “I promise I will. You too be careful yourselves,” she returned, bending over to hug and kiss Tessie. 

There was, to everyone’s relief, no more sign of the unknown killer’s further venturing out to take away lives. Somehow, in spite of the tense silence in town, Tessie’s fourth birthday felt more like a banquet in a time of mourning than a normal occasion to celebrate the little girl. It was so for the adults involved, and not at all the children, who of course were not told of what had been going on outside their safe homes. 

Tessie requested that her party should be Rapunzel and wizard-themed, and so every child that visited the birthday girl was given a party hat resembling a magician’s cap, as well as a cupcake each of which had a plastic figurine of a character from  _ Tangled. _

The new four year-old was wearing a crinkly pink frilly princess gown and a long, bright yellow wig that was an exact match of Rapunzel’s trailing golden tresses. She squealed with unabashed happiness, twirling around and around and watching the fake hair swathe her like a cocoon. 

“Careful, T-girl! You don’t want to fall,” Scott called, but gently and with good humor, from his place near some of the adult guests.

“Yeah, Tess, I’m gonna say ‘Rapunzel, Rapunzel, don’t fall down’ instead of ‘Let down your hair,” Scotty added, giggling, and prompting Tessie to stop and do the same. 

“Let’s dance, Scott!” the little girl squealed in reply, enthusiastically pulling her friend into a dance that was more exuberant spinning than any discernible move. 

Dina emerged from the house, a tray with a pastel-colored cake in her arms. It was the perfect moment for the grand finale of the party, since twilight was falling and the ‘4’ candle would glow that much brighter.

“Rapunzel, Rapunzel, who wants cake?”

Tesse twirled away from Scotty, grinning for all she was worth. “Me! I do!”

“Me too!” Scotty cheered, and he and the other children attending ran up to the table where Tessie blew the candle out after everyone sang her ‘Happy Birthday.’

Tessa came up to Scott, as the children resumed their now sugar-buzzed fun around the yard. 

“You holding up okay?” she asked him gently. 

He gave her a warm smile, moving his eyes away from the frolicking kids. “Sure! I’m great. Why?” But his sparkling eyes had an artificial cheer in them. 

“I see you’re really worried about something,” Tessa pressed on cautiously. “Talk to me. Maybe I can help?”

Scott shook his head, raking a tense hand through his hair. “I’m afraid not, T. No one can. Except probably the police,” he sighed. Tessa understood at once that he was talking about the unknown murderer _ .  _ The sudden threat that rocked Ilderton to its core. 

“They’ll catch him soon, I’m sure,” she told him weakly, because she was hardly certain of it. The police, while certainly capable, was dealing with such a dangerous criminal for the first time. Besides which, she did not want to discuss the matter at a child’s birthday party.

“Daddy! Tessa! Look, I captured the magic wand! Shazam!” Tessie shrieked in delight, brandishing the plastic, sword-looking ‘wand’ at them from the distance. 

Tessa had to laugh at the little girl’s infectious happiness. “I see. You make a good little wizard, eh?”

“Go charm Mommy, T-girl,” Scott said, encouraging Tessie. He had a ridiculous moment of worrying that Dina would be hurt with her own daughter singling out her would-be rival instead of her. But Dina was smiling, pretending to be ‘under the spell’ of Tessie’s pretend wand, to the child’s laughter. 

_ The perfect mother, _ Scott thought, a pang of guilt following.  _ And a damn good wife,  _ as Dina winked and grinned directly at him. But then, took out her abruptly ringing phone out of her skirt pocket, and frowned at the screen.

“Maman?” she spoke, tone hushed, as she picked the call up. 

Scott too had frowned - why would Estelle call right now? To tell Tessie happy birthday over the phone? The woman who hadn’t visited since her granddaughter had turned one? It was clear his first assumption was wrong, when he saw Dina disappear into the house, shutting the door after herself. Even if she stayed in the yard, still, he wouldn’t decipher what she and her mother talked about, disregarding his intention. Dina and Estelle’s rapid-fire Quebecois was as foreign to Scott as Ancient Greek.

Dina emerged, telling him with her eyes that she will disclose what her mother had said later, when the party would end. Scott obliged, but he caught Tessa’s worried glance, as if she thought he and his wife had problems in paradise. He, in his turn, returned his friend’s look and nodded, with a reassuring smile. Tessa smiled back, relaxing visibly.

“Maman wants me to come over and help her, but how I will do  _ that _ I have no idea. She says she’s in trouble,” Dina explained that very evening, as Tessie slumbered, full of cake and fruit punch and playing with her presents.

Scott perked up. Estelle in trouble? His mother-in-law was always breezing through life, from the little that he knew of the woman. She never burdened herself with pangs of conscience, awkward situations, and the like. 

“What kind of trouble?” he asked Dina warily.

She sighed, looking more frustrated than concerned. Picked at a stack of clean paper plates, taking them apart and folding them back into a neat pile. 

“She said...not in so many words, but I guessed it...that she’d just been scammed out of a serious amount of money.”

“What do you mean? What happened?”

Now Scott was worried. Admittedly, he’d never felt any familial connection to Estelle, but he had basic human compassion, and he felt genuinely concerned to hear that she’d essentially been robbed.

Another sigh, and Dina scowled, crossing her arms. “Well, apparently she’s been dating this guy who was, quote unquote, starting his own business, or so he said. He ended up borrowing several thousand dollars and basically running away.”

Scott exhaled, a stunned  _ whoosh.  _ “Now what?”

“She wants me to come over. Sounded pretty upset, and I can’t blame her. But how  _ stupid.  _ She knew that guy for a month, if that. What the hell was she doing giving him money and believing he’d return every cent?” Dina huffed and shook her head. “I can’t believe a forty-nine year-old woman is so  _ naive.  _ It’s like  _ I’m  _ the adult and  _ she’s  _ the child, and I have to go fix her mistakes now.”

She caught herself, glancing at him guiltily. “I know it sounds like I’m angry at her, and to be honest, I kind of am, but I wish I had a  _ normal  _ mother, eh? One who’s sweet and caring, not someone who has flings with scammers. I didn’t care what she does, really, as long as everyone is consenting and at least above twenty-one -” here, she smirked bitterly, “but, Scott. I’m tired of it. I’m tired of mothering  _ her.  _ There was that alcoholic, that drug addict, that dude who almost pulled her into some New-Age cult…” 

She listed Estelle’s casual relationships, her voice dripping with disapproval. 

“Listen,” she turned to him fully, taking his hand lightly in her small, French-nailed one. “Please. I hate asking you for this, but are you okay with caring for Tessie for a day or two? I swear, I won’t stay there with Maman more than is needed,” she asked, almost as if referring to a stranger.

He shifted closer to her, looked her deep in the eyes. “Di, this is Tessie,  _ our  _ daughter. Why on earth would I not be okay with staying with her?”

Dina cringed a bit. “I just...it’s ridiculous, but I don’t want to tell her I’m going to Grandma’s. It’ll hurt her, since ‘Grandma’ is hardly that for her, and it’s been four years already. I’m sorry. Just let’s tell her I’m going on a business trip or something.”

“That’s okay. I totally understand you.” Scott gave her as reassuring a smile as he was able to conjure. He opened his arms, and embraced her tightly and comfortingly.

As a son of a loving mother like Alma, the four years of marriage have been too few for Scott to understand why Dina and Estelle had such a strange relationship. But he filed it away, ever mindful of his wife’s feelings on the matter.

_ His life was finally going in the direction he wanted. Well, he hadn’t wanted  _ all  _ of what has gone on recently, but it was better than nothing. Actually, he was kind of into the fame he was getting. His letter had tiny, sleepy Ilderton on its hind legs. Worked up.  _ Scared of him.

_ Of him! The quiet kid in the last row of every classroom who was overlooked through high school and college, if not straight-up laughed at. _

_ He wasn’t overlooked now. No, sir. _

_ He felt like the hero of a thriller - a coldblooded, ruthless vigilante of whom everyone was equally awed and terrified.  _

_ Leaving the letter in the Baptist church mailbox had been a sudden stroke of genius and he was delighted to have thought of it. Of course, he was only too sorry that he had to teach her so cruel a lesson. He knew that. He’d played video games as a child - and this was just like a video game in which you went pow! slash! and stupid, naive sheeple tumbled dead, as if from a curse of Voldemort’s wand.  _

_ He wasn’t a serial killer, not in life, however. It was stupid how everyone thought playing video games turned children into killers. He wasn’t some sadistic player with lives, like in horror movies. He simply wanted justice. He wanted everything to be right.  _

_ Everything was right. He asked. She answered. Answered wrong. He showed her she was wrong. _

_ Action. Reaction. _

_ He opened his secret computer file and typed furiously, while the wave of inspiration could still carry him high. _

_ Then, he saw her again in the evening on his daily walk. In the flesh, healthy and well. _

_ Athletic, he would say. Since when? She was lean and active, but never downright sporty. She was now wearing leggings and a tank top, her long braided hair swinging as she walked. The details were irrelevant, as were the other silly, unimportant descriptions of the falling twilight. _

_ He came up to her and asked her again, hoping that this time she’d change her mind. _

_ For some reason, she frowned and tensed, answering with a question of her own. _

_ “Who are you?” _

_ What the fuck did she mean, who was he? Was she doing it deliberately? _

_ Whatever her athleticism was, it did not help her whatsoever. It was a weak spark of protest, extinguished by the torrential force of his anger. _

_ It was so easy, with his knife at her throat. Easier than last time.  _

_ The next morning, all he thought was  _ Why is she doing this? How can she be doing this?

_ He was pissed at her for making him do what he did the second time already. _

_ He was so distraught he did not write the whole following day, until he calmed down. _

*

The first day when Dina was in Montreal went well enough, as Scott and his daughter shared still another hockey rink workday. The little girl was still too far riding the wave of leftover birthday excitement to be sad for her mother’s absence. Dina FaceTimed here and there, always being in a neutral enough setting to filter Estelle out. 

Tessie grinned and spoke to her eagerly, but it was with Daddy she had her best fun of all. He let her skate on the ice, with enough space on it for everyone (she secretly sped up, but only a little, when Scott was busy with students). She colored in her small Disney book quietly in a seat in the stands and sipped at her small cup of hot chocolate (Scott would always be surprised without fail that such an absolutely carnivorous, dessert-skipping woman as Dina had given birth to such a sweet tooth as Tessie).

At the end of the day, he texted Tessa:  _ Hey, how are you, Tess? Doing anything this evening? _

Although, it was a lie to say that he sent her it without thinking. For one, Tessie kept repeating that she missed Scotty Virtue.

Just like that. “I miss Scott, Daddy. I wish we could play again.”

Who was he to deprive his little girl of her dear friend?

_ And you don’t want to deprive yourself of your dear not-quite-friend, don’t you, Moir? _

He did his best to silence the sarcastic voice in his mind. He wanted to invite Tessa and her son over as friends, because he cared about them both. In perhaps complicated ways, but he had been inseparable with Tessa in their childhood and adolescence. He was virtually powerless to keep his distance, now that she turned up in the same small town.

_ Oh, not really. Same old,  _ Tessa had replied then.

_ You guys can come over to our place. Tessie misses her friend. _

_ Ah, and you miss yours? :) _

For the life of him, Scott could not decipher her tone, in spite of the emoji. He chuckled under his breath.

_ I actually do, T. _

_ You know, I miss you, too. You call so rarely now that daycare’s shut down. Scooter misses Tess as well. Won’t stop talking about her. _

Their last sentence was unsent but thought by both of them in perfect unison:  _ I’ve been thinking about you myself. _

The playdate went awry not two hours into itself.

Scott had cursed himself as soon as he thought it, for taking his daughter to the rink again and not leaving her with Alma. It was most likely there that Tessie had caught a stomach bug and passed it on to Scotty in about a half hour. 

Scott and Tessa found themselves rushing back and forth in between the two sick children for the rest of the time, rubbing backs and bellies, shushing and wiping tears of fever and discomfort, cleaning up the meager, bland food that both the hapless kids threw up. 

A semi-frantic phone call to the pediatrician, and the children’s bouts with the nausea eased, after medicine and sips of water for hydration. 

“Hey, buddy, how are you?” Scott asked his small namesake gently. The little boy finally lay restlessly in bed. Scott felt his forehead. “He’s still a bit warm, Tess,” he reported to Tessa her son’s condition.

“M’kay,” Scotty whispered, letting out a feverish sigh. 

“So is Tessie. The fever should break completely after the meds,” Tessa murmured, checking up on the drowsy little girl, but she sounded anxious all the same. 

They stayed this way, on chairs near their respective childrens’ beds, hushing them, coaxing them to fall asleep. At one point, Tessa leaned in to her son to stroke his hair and kiss his cheek, when he murmured in his sleep. As she straightened up, she felt Scott take and squeeze her hand gently. So they remained, until Tessie and Scotty quieted. Holding hands and watching over their children.

Both of them filled with some relief as the children seemed to fall asleep, a slumber that would most likely be healing for their small but resilient bodies. They moved downstairs, to the living room, and both sat on the couch, keeping out an ear if Scotty or Tessie needed their parents.

“Some reunion,” Tessa said, at length, shaking her head ruefully with a small smile. A beat, and Scott found his palm grasping her pulled-up knee in comfort.

“It’s okay, T. They’ll get better soon, I know it,” he told her. His breath caught a tiny amount when she placed her own hand on top of his. 

“You should tell Dina what’s going on,” she urged him, a small frown on her forehead. “By the way, is she okay?”

“Oh, yeah, she is,” Scott hastened to say, but then, looking at Tessa’s concerned expression (and how lovely she was in spite of it), he knew he suddenly wanted to tell her everything that was going on in his family.

“Her mom’s in a bit of hot water, she went to help her out.” To Tessa’s confused look and raised eyebrows, he pursed his lips but went on. “You know...Estelle’s kind of a lot,” he went on, with a slightly awkward laugh. “She told Di she ended up dating some younger guy who borrowed a bunch of money and disappeared.”

Tessa  _ hmph- _ ed. “Poor lady.” But she was wearing a hint of a smirk. “Unlucky in love, huh?”

“You know, I can relate to her,” Scott mumbled. Then, as if realizing he spoke it, he glanced at Tessa. It was all he could to to will himself not to blush like a boy.

Her expression was surprised but gentle. Cautious. Like she didn’t want to admit she understood what he meant. 

“I mean,” he rushed on, “it’s really not what I meant to say, I just…”

But Tessa, his once-best friend, the woman he had secretly loved for so long; she understood. 

“What is it, then?”

Her green eyes did it again. Contributed to his loss of willpower, drawing him in like all that time ago; like there was no nameless murderer stalking the town, like there was no Dina and no children, his own and hers, sleeping upstairs - 

He leaned in all the way, breath catching at her soft exhale against his lips. Unlike the airport several years before, there was no urgent passion, no hurry to kiss as much as possible before separating. Tessa’s lips parted for his mouth slowly, gently, almost by instinct. As if they’d already kissed hundreds, thousands of times. 

Scott did not know how the hell he went from discussing his rather odd mother-in-law to kissing his childhood friend on the same couch in the same living room where he and Dina had been kissing, too, for nigh on five years. Yet, he couldn’t bring himself to give one damn about it - not when Tessa’s hair was so soft and strawberry-scented, making his heart skip and then beat wildly; not when her cheeks were so warm and her lips and her tongue and all her fascinating, intoxicating essence so sweet and beckoning. 

Tessa looked almost afraid, as they parted. “Scott…” she faltered, but her hands kept stroking the hair at the back of his neck. He gazed into her eyes, reaffirming by looking at her what his mouth had tried to say moments earlier.

It was so simple. He had to speak it, then, had to let go of this secret he’d held on to for so long.

“I love you. I still love  _ you.” _

He saw instantly that her eyes glistened. A flash of guilt overtook him, and he parted his mouth, only to feel the sensation of hers again. This time light, reassuring. Comforting. 

“Daddy? Aunt Tessa?”

_ Shit. Shit. No. Not his daughter stumbling upon them. Walking in on her father cheating. _

Sure enough, Tessie stood at the foot of the stairs, wrapped loosely in her favorite fleece blanket, its edges trailing on the floor. He wasted no time in springing from the couch to hurry over and pick the little girl up. 

“Baby girl,” he said, with a concerned kiss to her forehead. “How are you feeling?” He was so attentive to his daughter that he did not notice Tessa getting up and walking to them. She placed a tender hand on Tessie’s small shoulder.

The little girl gave them both a curious look, but thankfully, did not ask about the kiss she inadvertently witnessed. “All right, Daddy,” she said quietly. To their relief, she gave them a soft smile.

“You should go get some more sleep, Miss Tessie,” Tessa told her, her voice kind. Her eyes widened, unexpectedly. “Oh my goodness, I have to go check on Scotty!” she whispered, already hurrying to climb the stairs as softly as possible. Scott followed more slowly, Tessie having nestled her head on his shoulder.

Scotty turned out to be soundly asleep upstairs. Tessa leaned to brush a featherlight kiss to his cheek, as not to wake her son up. Scott re-tucked Tessie into her own bed. The children resumed their slumber, until morning, when both parents were happy to see them sleeping the majority of the sickness off already.

Dina, who came back later that day, was consumed with Tessie’s well-being. She offered several standard phrases telling Scott her mother was fine. More so, she never questioned why Tessa and Scotty had been in to their house late enough that they had to stay overnight. Scott knew she would not begrudge their sleepover, given the extenuating circumstances, and yet he avoided her eyes for the majority of the day.

He never mentioned the kiss to Tessa, either by look or by gesture. It was cowardly of him, and he knew they needed to address it soon. 

She never responded to his ‘I love you.’ He did not really expect her to. He hated himself enough for possibly guilting her into silence, since he, a married man, had kissed her in his family home.

They never had the chance to talk about it, either, because the news of a second death in Ilderton disrupted them even more than the forbidden gesture.

Dina hated it all. She hated having to listen and read the various reports outlining the murder of Lois Hamilton. She hated having to talk to Lois’s distraught parents, even as Leo stood by her and offered support to them and to her. Most of all, she hated, hated,  _ hated _ that she couldn’t shake the niggling assumption of who might be behind this horror.

His note was distressing. Shorter and somehow more frightening than last time.

_ The red flower fought to live. The boot crushed it anyway. _

Fleetingly, she’d wondered aloud to Leo why Lois, a karate black belt, was unable to fight the murderer off. Dina had known the girl - she’d recently opened a studio for kids, instilling a love for the martial art in the youngest ones. 

“There isn’t much she was able to do. There really were signs of struggle on the site. She fought fiercely, but ultimately, a knife to the throat is a knife to the throat, no matter how you fight.”

Leo had grimly told her the coronary results, his face frowning and worn out. Dina listened to him, until he asked if she was okay, probably seeing her stricken expression. All she managed was a suppressed whimper.

She tossed the slip of paper face down on the table, hours later, after a dozenth reread. She could bear no more seeing of the killer’s words that sounded like some cruel twist on a poem. There was, too, the daunting thought that she might as well resign as forensic linguist. She had absolutely no idea who would have had the capacity to both kill two women in a row and write mocking pseudo-literary messages to the police about it.

But she did have the sickening thought that would not let her go.

She had to let someone know, to do at least something that would lead them to a suspect, but never in hell could she risk someone - God forbid Scott - getting into it.

Just like that, she knew who would help her.

“Hold up, Ger. You...you  _ know  _ the asshole?” 

Leo almost spit his coffee out, when she stammered her anxious theory to him, backstory and all. She left out some details of how precisely she would know  _ him. Nobody needs that, Geraldine,  _ she chastised herself.

“I think he might be doing it.” She stared hard at Leo, willing him to understand, and finished, in a hoarse murmur, “I think he might be stalking  _ me.  _ I don’t know if he did kill himself, like he said he would. Could have come over here from Montreal.”

Leo looked sympathetic, but alert, as he pulled up a pad of paper. “What’s his name, did you say?” He did not seem eager to argue the point further.

Dina shut her eyes for a second. Then, forced herself to pronounce a name she had done her best to forget, five years ago.

“Steve Carter.”

All nerves, she came back into their office the next day. Was she more scared or ready to find out if he was the one behind everything? She did her best not to tremble, greeting Leo and sitting down. Her hands were damp with fearful anticipation.

Leo’s expression was unreadable when at last, he spoke.

“Well...I did find a Steven Carter, living in Ilderton.”

Dina gripped the table, struggling to calm the roaring of blood in her ears.

“And?”

Did he sound disappointed or trying to soothe her? Leo followed up, sighing slightly.

“The thing is…”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...here was an update! I'll try to get the next in sooner. If you liked it, leave comments, if not - please don't try to kill me in them😱

**Author's Note:**

> Thoughts? I would so love to hear from you, dears😀


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